I’m a nurse, so my days at work are full. I always called the daycare to check on my Stinky though. Now that she is gone, I still find myself glancing at the clock to see if it’s time for me to check on her. Then I remember. ..she’s not with me anymore. My ride to and from work has changed. My “things to do when I get home” list has changed. The sound of my house has changed. Everything feels. ….changed. I’m trying to remember what did I do before I became a mom. What filled my time before I decided to take this journey?
Tonight has been a tougher one. I haven’t fought my tears. I’ve just let my heart cry. I miss my Stinky Fairy.
I had loved my family, friends and a man…but never had experienced loving as a mother. Being a mother has made me more appreciative of love and the bonds that we create with one another. It has also taught me the dangers of holding on to love that is unhealthy and the space required to facilitate that for someone you love even if that someone is you.