I arrived to pick up my Stinky Fairy around 1040 this morning. It is becoming our “normal” for Mrs.D and I to chat for a while…which ended with Stinky and I not leaving until 1 pm. We click so well that the time just flies. Stinky had done well with her overnight. She started to do some pouting and just seem overall easily upset maybe an hour into me being there. Mrs.D said that was Stinky’s first time showing those behaviors. I told her that considering it was her and I there with Stinky…she could just have A LOT of feelings and heck…..who wouldn’t?? Stinky would lie on “Mom” and then lie on me. She literally went back and forth a few times and it didn’t feel awkward but I do think she felt torn in some ways. Stinky bounced back though and was fine with leaving with me. She did start crying once we were down the road. She was crying, “Mommy” but in a few minutes she was asleep. I PROMISE you…if that child cried even a minute more, I was pulling over and calling Mrs.D ! I refuse to see her hurting or revisiting memories of when she was separated from her bio mom.
So…what in the world do you do on your last “full” day with your little one?? We went to see Frozen which was crazy awesome…went out for dinner…went home and watched another movie at her request. It was awesome and sad…and happy. I had on some Jesus Culture (Kim Walker) and just having a moment with the Lord…which she has seen multiple times. I was crying and just worshipping Him. My Stinky puts her forehead on mine and lifts up my chin. It was such a sweet gesture that felt like so much more. It was like God was giving me comfort through the one person in reach of me. It was beautiful.
I work my 12 hr shift tomorrow and then pick her up at night. The next day will be the meeting at my home with the caseworker, therapist, and the D family. My Stinky will take the last of her belongings and basically be officially moved over. It was the weirdest packing up her belongings and bringing toys over to the new house.
I’m sure there’s the potential to make my recent posts sound really deep/intellectual…but sometimes the heart gets lost in translation.