I would be completely fibbing if I said that I was not a bit nervous now. As Amber would say, (see comments) I sound like I’m 8-9 months preggers..ready to pop LOL. These next few days will be “summer cleaning gone wild”. I never realized how much medication/harmful/toxic items I had in my home until I had to lock them all up! Last week when I went upstairs, my mind played a full-out scenario of The Blessing falling down them. I immediately added : SAFETY GATE to my “Get on it list”. These weeks have flown by and I think rather than realizing I was nervous…I just subconsciously delayed cleaning/organizing/ turning in paperwork. Well, reality has hit with Tuesday being my last class. The rubber is about to hit the road ( as my Pastor says)!
I’ve been getting the normal feedback/ FAQs re: my decision to do foster care.
- 1. People are usually surprised that I’m doing this alone. – It was not so much that I decided to do foster care alone. I chose to toss my plans and thoughts on how it “should be” and how I may be perceived by others. This decision originates from my relationship with God. I felt an urgency that I chose to not ignore. I believe He has a calling/purpose for all of our lives when we submit and decrease so that He may increase in us. He made it so plain to my spirit so I will walk in it with the Father.
- People think I don’t want my own or can’t have children. – This decision did not arise from a desire to fulfil a ticking clock! Yes, I do want children and am able to have children (far as I know). These children in foster care need good people NOW…not in the near/far future
or land of eventuallywhen my soon to be comes on the scene. If a man doesn’t want to date me because I do foster care ~ he would never understand my heart anyway.
- Aren’t you afraid that you’ll get to attached? – We’re human! I don’t know how well of a foster mom I could be without some type of attachment. It must be healthy and with the understanding that reunification is the goal! If my intentions were mostly to adopt, I feel that I’d be setting myself up for heartbreak by doing foster care. I believe my experience as a nurse may help me deal with balancing my emotions. However, this is my thought process without having experienced it fully yet. If the relationship between the child and I felt shared and the case plan changed, I would consider adoption.
I do remember how anxious my family felt during the adoption process of my two sisters. We didn’t have to deal with any opposition for the other four. We were a black family adopting two precious white sisters..Jade was only 3 months at placement and her sister, Seanna was 2 yrs old. I was so sad at the understanding that they could be out of my life forever with a phone call. A relative or two had appealed which prolonged the process but I suppose they did not complete their classes or etc. I wrote all this to say, YES…it will be difficult to be in the foster-adopt planning and then a relative appears and the child is sent on her merry way with family. You know what the awesome assurance is in all of this? I have a refuge…I have a peace. I have faith that all things work together for my good. Am I strong enough to do this alone? I’m not, but He is..ABLE.